If Trick or Treats taught me anything, it’s that sometimes the scariest part of a horror movie isn’t the killer—it’s realizing you have another 40 minutes to go and the only real danger you’re in is dying of boredom. Written, shot, edited, and directed by Gary Graver (because apparently no one else wanted their name on it), this is the Halloween-themed slasher/dark comedy hybrid that manages to fail at both being scary and being funny, leaving you with 90 minutes of cinematic purgatory.
The “Plot” – And I Use That Word Generously
The movie kicks off with a domestic ambush, as Malcolm O’Keefe is committed to a mental asylum by his wife Joan in a scene so clumsily staged it looks like an improv class that forgot the script. They even fight in a swimming pool for no apparent reason other than “water makes it dramatic,” which it doesn’t.
Fast forward a few years, and we meet Linda, a babysitter with the patience of a saint and the survival instincts of a lobotomized goldfish. She’s stuck watching Christopher—Joan’s son—on Halloween night while Joan is off in Vegas doing a magic act with her new husband. Christopher spends most of the film pulling endless “pranks” on Linda, which makes the middle 60% of this movie feel like Home Alone if Kevin were a budding sociopath and the Wet Bandits just never showed up.
Malcolm’s Escape – Or, How Not to Build Tension
While Christopher is busy pretending to be a junior David Copperfield, Malcolm escapes from the asylum in a sequence so devoid of suspense you half expect the guards to wave goodbye and hand him cab fare. He then spends the rest of the movie skulking around, stabbing the wrong people, and taking so long to actually do anything that you start rooting for him just to move the plot along.
The Babysitter From Hell (No, Not the Killer—The Kid)
Christopher is easily one of the most infuriating children ever put on film. His constant fake-out pranks aren’t just annoying—they’re a form of psychological warfare. Smoke bombs, joy buzzers, fake guillotines—by the 40-minute mark, you’re actively hoping the witch from Superstition wanders in just to drown him in that pond. The “dark comedy” aspect hinges entirely on the idea that this is charming mischief. It’s not. It’s like watching a YouTube prank channel run by Satan’s nephew.
Death Scenes on a Budget
The kills are few, far between, and almost aggressively uninspired. Malcolm fatally stabs Linda’s friend Andrea, but only because he mistakes her for Joan—a twist so lazy it feels like the actor just wandered onto the wrong set. There’s a guillotine payoff at the end, but even that feels like a setup for an Itchy & Scratchy gag rather than the climactic moment of a horror movie.
The Ending – And the Last Cheap Trick
Linda manages to rig Christopher’s toy guillotine into an actual deadly weapon (sure, why not) and takes out Malcolm. Just when you think it’s over, the film ends with Christopher about to stab Linda in a freeze-frame, as if the movie is saying, “Yeah, we’re done here, but wouldn’t it be wild if we just… didn’t explain anything?” It’s less of a shocking twist and more of a final prank from the filmmakers: Surprise! There’s no real ending!
Final Verdict – A Treat for No One
Trick or Treats tries to be a slasher with a dark comedic edge, but instead it’s like being stuck in a Halloween party where the only entertainment is a hyperactive child and an escaped mental patient who spends most of the night hiding in your attic doing nothing. The biggest horror is that David Carradine is in this for about five minutes, presumably to pay a phone bill, and Steve Railsback shows up looking like even he’s wondering how he got talked into this.
If you came for scares, you’ll be disappointed. If you came for laughs, you’ll be disappointed. If you came because you heard it was “so bad it’s good,” you might get halfway through before realizing it’s just “so bad it’s bad.”
