Children of the Corn, but Without the Corn (or the Fun)
Who Can Kill a Child? promises a tense moral dilemma, but instead delivers a 90-minute sunburn with intermittent screaming. Director Narciso Ibáñez Serrador starts with a heavy-handed documentary montage of war atrocities against children—a grim, sobering choice that suggests this might be a serious meditation on the cycle of violence. Then the actual movie starts, and… it’s about a British couple slowly realizing that Spanish island kids are homicidal little gremlins. It’s like someone mashed Lord of the Flies with Gilligan’s Island and forgot to add entertainment.
The Leads: Bland and Blinder
Lewis Fiander and Prunella Ransome, as Tom and Evelyn, wander through the plot with the energy of mildly irritated tourists whose hotel lost their reservation. For a couple allegedly fighting for their lives, they spend an awful lot of time strolling, gawking, and saying things like, “That’s odd,” while children openly sharpen weapons. Evelyn’s character arc ends with her unborn child turning evil and killing her from the inside—proving that the only real prenatal care on this island is homicide.
The Villains: Pint-Sized Psychopaths
The killer kids are the film’s supposed selling point, but they’re mostly just blank-faced extras who act creepy in the least imaginative ways possible. No black eyes. No demon voices. Just a lot of staring, slow walking, and occasionally bludgeoning someone with farm tools. Imagine Village of the Damned if the budget for special effects was spent entirely on sunscreen.
Pacing: Death by Vacation
The movie unfolds at such a leisurely pace that you start to suspect the director was secretly trying to lull the audience into heatstroke. Key scenes—like the first killing the couple witnesses—should shock, but instead feel like you’ve wandered into the wrong channel halfway through a siesta. The score tries to inject menace, but mostly sounds like it’s auditioning for a 1970s nature documentary.
The Ending: Everyone Loses
By the finale, Tom is gunned down by police who think he’s murdering innocent children (to be fair, from their perspective, he is). The military leaves their weapons unattended like they’ve never seen a movie before, and within minutes the kids kill them too. The closing shot of the evil children preparing to head to mainland Spain is supposed to be chilling—but it’s more like watching a field trip leave the dock, minus the permission slips.
Final Verdict: A Horror Film That Should Be Grounded
Who Can Kill a Child? wastes its intriguing premise by moving at the speed of a package holiday brochure. The moral question posed by the title is an interesting one—too bad the movie answers it with, “You’ll be bored enough to consider it after an hour.” If you want to watch children kill adults in creative, shocking ways, you’d be better off with The Bad Seed, The Omen, or even just eavesdropping at a Chuck E. Cheese on a Saturday.
