A Heist With Wrinkles and Romance
By 1987, Peter Falk had already perfected the art of looking like a man who knows more than he’s letting on. In Columbo, it made him an immortal TV detective. In Happy New Year, it makes him an aging jewel thief disguised as a cranky grandpa. Either way, Falk’s trick is the same: that slouchy charm, the raspy mutter, and those eyes that say, “I’m about to fleece you, but you’ll thank me for it.”
Directed by John G. Avildsen—yes, the man who gave us Rocky and The Karate Kid—this is not a film about underdog boxers or crane kicks. It’s about one last big score, the ridiculous disguises it takes to pull it off, and the surprising possibility that love might be the only thing more dangerous than a Harry Winston security system.
It’s part caper, part romance, part slapstick—and somehow it all works, mostly because Peter Falk could sell ice to Eskimos, or diamonds to diamond dealers.
The Setup: Palm Beach and High-End Larceny
Falk plays Nick, a seasoned thief with one last job on his bucket list: robbing a Palm Beach Harry Winston store of its glittering rocks. His partner Charlie (Charles Durning, built like a Thanksgiving turkey stuffed with bourbon) is along for the ride, though mostly to wheeze, complain, and eat sandwiches.
The mark: Edward Saunders (Tom Courtenay), a jewelry store manager so earnest he could talk you into financing cubic zirconia. Watching him fawn over customers is half the comedy—he’s the sort of man who would happily hand a necklace to a burglar if they said please.
But Nick isn’t just casing the store. He’s also falling in love with Carolyn (Wendy Hughes), a sharp, elegant antique dealer whose boutique is conveniently right next door. While she’s haggling over Louis XVI tables, he’s haggling over whether to throw away his career in crime for love.
Falk in Disguise: The Real Special Effects
This film got an Oscar nomination for Best Makeup, and it shows. Falk doesn’t just wear disguises—he becomes them. He’s an old widower, stooped and sentimental, melting Edward’s heart while also clocking the alarm system. He’s a grumpy old lady with a handbag full of attitude. Each transformation is absurd, convincing, and hilarious.
Forget CGI de-aging. Falk proves all you need is a little latex, a lot of gravel in your voice, and a shameless commitment to the bit. It’s a joy watching him play dress-up like a kid raiding grandma’s closet—except this grandma is planning grand larceny.
Charles Durning: The Human Meatball Sidekick
Charlie, Nick’s partner, doesn’t do much heavy lifting in the plot. But Charles Durning makes sure he does heavy breathing. He’s the kind of crook who looks like he’d be winded stealing a loaf of bread, let alone diamonds. And yet, his loyalty is touching. Watching these two aging crooks argue about disguises, women, and retirement is like watching Statler and Waldorf from The Muppet Show plan a heist.
Romance Among the Rubies
The real surprise of Happy New Year isn’t the heist—it’s the romance. Nick and Carolyn’s relationship starts with bickering over antiques and grows into something unexpectedly warm. Wendy Hughes plays Carolyn with elegance and steel, a woman who can spot a fake from a mile away. You can see why Nick falls for her: she’s the one person in Palm Beach who can out-negotiate him.
But can a jewel thief retire into love? Or is Nick doomed to end up in prison, muttering “just one more job” until the end of time? The film keeps that tension alive, never quite letting you forget that this charming romance is built on lies, wigs, and fake dentures.
The Heist: Slapstick With Diamonds
When the big robbery finally comes, it’s more Looney Tunes than Heat. There are disguises, pratfalls, and plans that almost—but not quite—fall apart. Avildsen shoots it with a light touch, leaning into the comedy instead of the suspense. You’re not on the edge of your seat wondering if they’ll succeed; you’re chuckling at how ridiculous it all looks.
And that’s the secret: this isn’t a hardboiled crime drama. It’s a caper comedy where the laughs are worth more than the loot.
The Makeup: Worth an Oscar Nod, Worth the Laughs
The Academy actually nominated this film for Best Makeup, which sounds insane until you watch it. Falk’s transformations are the heart of the comedy, and the makeup sells every gag. Sure, Harry and the Hendersons won (because Bigfoot, apparently, is harder than disguising Columbo). But Falk’s rubbery old-lady routine deserved a trophy.
The disguises aren’t just gimmicks—they’re character studies. Each mask is a way for Nick to slip into someone else’s skin, someone who isn’t a crook on his last job. By the end, you realize the disguises aren’t hiding who he is—they’re revealing the parts he wishes he could be.
Bill Conti and The Temptations: A Weird but Welcome Combo
Bill Conti, best known for making Rocky run up stairs, provides the score here. It’s jaunty, breezy, and occasionally sentimental. But the real kicker? The Temptations show up to croon “I Only Have Eyes for You” throughout the film. Yes, that Temptations. They don’t just sing it once; the song becomes a motif, a theme, a romantic punchline.
It’s bizarre, it’s on-the-nose, and it works. Because when Peter Falk looks at Wendy Hughes with his crumpled face and mutters affection, you believe he only has eyes for her. Even if those eyes are glued to a diamond necklace at the same time.
Avildsen’s Direction: The Underdog of Heist Movies
John G. Avildsen had a career built on underdogs. Rocky. Daniel LaRusso. And now, two aging jewel thieves in bad wigs. He doesn’t play this as a serious thriller; he plays it as a comedy about men past their prime, trying to pull off one last hurrah. It’s about aging, disguise, and whether love can redeem you even after decades of bad choices.
Sure, it tanked at the box office. Sure, critics didn’t know what to make of it. But like its characters, the film has aged into cult status, a weird little relic that still sparkles if you look at it right.
Final Verdict: A Gem in Disguise
Happy New Year is not perfect. It’s uneven, it’s silly, and it feels like two different movies stitched together with dental adhesive. But it’s also charming, funny, and oddly poignant. Peter Falk turns disguises into comedy gold, Charles Durning huffs along like a loyal bulldog, and Wendy Hughes brings a sophistication that makes the romance believable.
It’s not about the heist—it’s about what happens when the mask slips, when love shows up, and when a crook starts wondering if maybe he deserves a happy ending.
So pour a drink, hum along with The Temptations, and enjoy the fact that in 1987, someone thought, “Let’s put Columbo in a wig and rob Harry Winston.” Thank God they did.
