There’s something darkly poetic about The Girl in the Photographs being the last film produced by horror legend Wes Craven before his death — poetic in the sense that it feels like the horror genre itself briefly flatlined out of respect. Directed by Nick Simon and billed as a “thriller,” this film is less Scream … Read More “The Girl in the Photographs (2015): Say Cheese and Die of Boredom” »
There are some movie titles that tell you exactly what you’re getting into. Sharknado promised tornadoes with sharks. Snakes on a Plane delivered snakes. On a plane. But Ghost Shark 2: Urban Jaws? That title alone sounds like a drunken game of Mad Libs gone rogue. It has everything — ghosts, sharks, cities, and apparently … Read More “Ghost Shark 2: Urban Jaws (2015): When the Only Thing Scarier Than the Shark Is the Movie Itself” »
There’s a reason you don’t mix high school theater and horror movies: both are full of drama, bad lighting, and people pretending to die. The Gallows (2015), directed by Chris Lofing and Travis Cluff, is proof that some things should stay buried — especially the found footage genre. In theory, it’s a promising setup: 20 … Read More “The Gallows (2015): Found Footage Hangs Itself” »
There’s a special place in horror hell reserved for movies that promise epic monster battles and instead deliver a student film with the pacing of a funeral and the lighting of a parking garage. Frankenstein vs. The Mummy (2015), written and directed by Damien Leone, confidently stumbles into that cursed category. This film dares to … Read More “Frankenstein vs. The Mummy (2015): When Two Monsters Collide and Everyone Loses” »
There are bad Halloween movies, and then there’s Hellions — a film so bafflingly incoherent it makes you nostalgic for Hocus Pocus 2. Directed by Bruce McDonald and written by Pascal Trottier, this 2015 Canadian horror film tries to be a surreal nightmare about teen pregnancy, motherhood, and demonic trick-or-treaters. What it actually delivers is … Read More ““Hellions” (2015): A Trick-or-Treat Bag Full of Regret” »
If immortality is supposed to be glamorous, Jack didn’t get the memo. In He Never Died, Henry Rollins plays a centuries-old cannibal who looks like he’s been living off protein shakes and pure rage since the Bronze Age. Written and directed by Jason Krawczyk, this 2015 horror comedy is a deadpan, blood-soaked, oddly touching story … Read More ““He Never Died” (2015): Eternal Damnation, Bingo Nights, and the Grumpiest Immortal in Cinema” »
There are movies that pay homage to classics. Then there’s Harbinger Down, which duct-tapes itself to The Thing, screams “PRACTICAL EFFECTS FOREVER!” and then promptly drowns in the Bering Sea of its own good intentions. This 2015 creature feature — written and directed by Alec Gillis, starring Lance Henriksen, and allegedly made to prove that … Read More ““Harbinger Down” (2015): When Nostalgia Mutates Into Mediocrity” »
There are bad horror movies, and then there’s Hangman — a film that makes you wish the killer had just taken you out in the first five minutes so you wouldn’t have to watch the rest. Directed by Adam Mason, Hangman attempts to blend the found-footage creepiness of Paranormal Activity with the voyeuristic dread of … Read More ““Hangman” (2015): When Home Invasion Horror Becomes a 90-Minute PSA for Changing Your Locks” »
If you’ve ever been in a band, you know the struggle — bad pay, worse crowds, and that one show you’ll remember for all the wrong reasons. Jeremy Saulnier’s Green Room takes that universal musician trauma and cranks it up to eleven. It’s the story of a broke punk band that accidentally stumbles into a … Read More ““Green Room” (2015): Punk Rock, Blood Loss, and the Worst Gig Ever Booked” »
Ah, Goosebumps — that gateway drug for every millennial who wanted to read Stephen King but still feared the dark. R. L. Stine’s books were the literary equivalent of a haunted Happy Meal: fun, fast, and guaranteed to leave you with mild psychological trauma. So when Sony Pictures decided to turn the Goosebumps franchise into … Read More ““Goosebumps” (2015): When Your Childhood Nightmares Get a Studio Deal” »