Alone (aka Final Days in the UK, presumably because Mildly Inconvenienced Indoors didn’t test well) is what happens when someone says, “What if we made a zombie movie set entirely in an apartment?” and then forgot to add… almost everything else. It’s not the worst thing ever made; it’s just aggressively fine, like a mid-tier … Read More “Alone (aka Final Days in the UK)” »
If you’ve ever looked at a sticky, neon-lit dive bar full of retired dudes and thought, “If a drug-fueled murder horde burst through that door right now, these old guys would absolutely wreck shop,” VFW is the movie that smugly pats you on the shoulder and says, “Correct.” It’s a gnarly, beer-soaked, ultra-violent love letter … Read More “VFW” »
Us is the rare horror movie where the more you think about it, the worse it gets—and Jordan Peele seems very confident that you’ll be thinking about it a lot. Unfortunately, most of that thinking is, “Wait… what?” followed by, “No, seriously, what?” Don’t get me wrong: the performances are strong, the imagery is striking, … Read More “Us” »
If you’ve ever watched Sweeney Todd and thought, “This would be better with more sunshine, more sausages, and way more casual racism,” Two Heads Creek is basically your unhinged wish granted. It’s a cheerfully deranged little horror-comedy that takes on xenophobia, colonial guilt, and small-town Australian weirdness—all through the lens of cannibal sausage production. Somehow, … Read More “Two Heads Creek” »
There’s a version of To Your Last Death that exists only in its own marketing blurb, and that version sounds incredible: R-rated animated horror. Time loops. Cosmic entities gambling with human lives. William Shatner narrating like it’s a Twilight Zone fanfiction. Morena Baccarin as a sadistic extradimensional game master. You read that and think, Oh, … Read More “To Your Last Death” »
If you’ve ever watched Cast Away and thought, “This would be better with less volleyball and more sea demon,” Sweetheart is basically your wish granted by a very spiteful ocean god. It’s a lean, stripped-down survival horror movie that quietly does about twelve things better than most big-budget monster flicks: it’s tense, focused, gorgeously shot, … Read More “Sweetheart” »
There’s slow-burn horror, and then there’s Silence & Darkness, which is less “slow burn” and more “damp match that occasionally hisses menacingly.” On paper, this movie sounds like the kind of indie thriller that could really mess you up: two disabled sisters, isolated in the countryside with their unnervingly clinical father, gradually realizing they’re the … Read More “Silence & Darkness” »
If He Never Died was “immortal grumpy dad discovers he’s basically a biblical monster,” then She Never Died is his chaotic little sister who shows up, eats sex traffickers, shrugs off bullets, and still has less patience for humans than for oatmeal. It’s bloody, weirdly sweet, surprisingly smart, and powered almost entirely by Oluniké Adeliyi … Read More “She Never Died” »
There are many ways to adapt a manga about cute girls surviving the zombie apocalypse while one of them is having a full-blown mental break. School-Live! (2019) bravely chooses the one where you strip out most of the nuance, add idols, and hope nobody notices because the cast smiles a lot and there are school … Read More “School-Live! (2019)” »
There’s something almost poetic about Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark taking a series of gloriously creepy, minimalist campfire tales and turning them into a PG-13 episode of “Are You Afraid of the Dark?” directed by someone who just discovered Instagram filters. This is a movie based on Alvin Schwartz’s nightmare fuel books and … Read More “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark” »