If cinematic trainwrecks had a regional theater awards show, Shantytown Honeymoon would walk away with a gold spray-painted hubcap for “Best Use of Mosquito-Filled Locations and Questionable Theology.” Directed—well, stapled together—by Donn Davison, with Fred Olen Ray duct-taping a few extra scenes on in 1986, this film is less a movie and more a tax … Read More “Shantytown Honeymoon (1972)” »
There’s surrealism, and then there’s what happens when someone huffs a can of silver spray paint, reads Poe’s “The System of Doctor Tarr and Professor Fether” out loud to a cactus, and declares themselves a visionary. The Mansion of Madness, Juan López Moctezuma’s directorial debut, lands squarely in the latter category. Let’s be generous and … Read More ““The Mansion of Madness” (1973): Gothic Nonsense with a Paintbrush Up Its Nose” »
In La Rose de Fer, Jean Rollin does not merely make a movie — he exhumes one. From the soft, worm-laced earth of cinema’s more poetic underbelly, he conjures a film that is less concerned with plot than with mood, less a story than a surreal eulogy whispered by a woman who dances barefoot on … Read More ““La Rose de Fer” (1973): A Memento Mori Wrapped in Romance and Rot” »
Let’s be honest. When the words “supernatural,” “1970s,” “made-for-TV,” and “William Shatner” appear in the same sentence, you already know the oxygen masks are going to drop — not because of cabin pressure, but because the script is suffocating everyone on board. The Horror at 37,000 Feet isn’t a movie. It’s an FAA violation in … Read More “The Horror at 37,000 Feet (1973): William Shatner Faces Druid Ghosts at Cruising Altitude and You’re Stuck in Coach Watching” »
There are films so bad they’re good. Godmonster of Indian Flats isn’t one of them. It’s a 93-minute act of cinematic self-harm masquerading as social allegory, and by the end, you’ll wish the mutant sheep had devoured everyone involved — director, cast, possibly the projectionist, and yes, even you. Fredric Hobbs, who both wrote and … Read More “Godmonster of Indian Flats (1973): A Fleece-Filled Folly in a Fungal Wasteland” »
There are bad films, and then there are films so drenched in mildew, incompetence, and dubious lighting choices that watching them feels like getting trapped in a motel with no checkout time and a broken remote. Don’t Look in the Basement (or The Forgotten, or Death Ward #13—this movie has more aliases than a parolee) … Read More “Don’t Look in the Basement (1973): Madness, Mold, and the Murder of Narrative Logic” »
There was a time when “Movie of the Week” didn’t mean “something you’ll forget before the rerun,” but something crackling with craft, menace, and surprise. Into that vintage slot of televised terror comes Dying Room Only, a chilly, sun-blasted paranoia piece written by I Am Legend’s Richard Matheson and anchored by a harrowing, controlled, and … Read More “Dying Room Only (1973): Cloris Leachman Checks Into the Twilight Zone, And It’s a Hell of a Stay” »
If The Devil’s Wedding Night were an actual wedding, it would be the kind where the bride gets drunk, the groom forgets his vows, and the priest turns out to be a werewolf. Directed—technically—by both Luigi Batzella and Joe D’Amato (yes, that Joe D’Amato), this 1973 Italian mess doesn’t so much “unfold” as it spills … Read More “The Devil’s Wedding Night (1973): Or, How to Bury a Script Under 94 Minutes of Muddled Gothic Slop” »
There are movies that defy logic. Then there are movies that mug it in a dark alley, rob it of its dignity, and leave its corpse propped up in a gothic mansion surrounded by fog, candles, cats, and Klaus Kinski sniffing embalming fluid. Death Smiles on a Murderer is that movie. It doesn’t just throw … Read More “Death Smiles on a Murderer (1973): A Murderous Smirk at Coherence” »
There are slow burns, and then there’s A Cold Night’s Death, a film so glacial in pace and so numbing in its atmosphere that even the monkeys in the plot start to look like they’re checking their watches and muttering, “Are we done yet?” This made-for-TV thriller aired on ABC in January 1973, and much … Read More “A Cold Night’s Death (1973): Freeze-Dried Frustration in a Made-for-TV Glacier” »