Somewhere in the parched farmlands of early 1970s California, a small group of people got together and said, “Let’s make a horror movie about Satan, eternal youth, and walnuts.” What they produced was The Touch of Satan — a film that, much like Satan’s actual touch, leaves you disoriented, itchy, and filled with deep regret. … Read More “The Touch of Satan (1971) A Bad Movie That Feels Like a Satanic Hallmark Card Written by a Sleep-Deprived Goat” »
There’s something undeniably seductive about the giallo film. It’s like cinematic absinthe — beautiful, strange, and liable to leave you bleeding out in a baroque hallway with a knife in your back and a pastel-tinted flashback playing over your final breath. Sergio Martino’s The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh is one of the most exquisite … Read More “The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh (1971) A Giallo So Sharp, Even the Razor Killer’s Therapist Is Nervous” »
Let’s start with a question: If you’re going to make a Jack the Ripper movie set in modern-day London (well, 1971), and cast Paul Naschy as a limping ex-acrobat suspected of murdering prostitutes, is there any conceivable chance this could be subtle?No. There is not.And thank God for that. Seven Murders for Scotland Yard — … Read More “Seven Murders for Scotland Yard (1971) A Jack the Ripper Movie with a Limp, a Shrug, and a Jar of Kidneys” »
Let’s get one thing straight: Paper Man is a television movie made in 1971 about a computer committing murder. If that sentence doesn’t make you want to dig out a fondue set and scream into your rotary phone, I don’t know what will. This CBS “Friday Night Movie” aired back when people thought “artificial intelligence” … Read More “Paper Man (1971) A Surprisingly Sharp Punch Card to the Gut” »
Let’s say you’re a werewolf. You’ve been shot with silver bullets and pronounced dead — standard procedure, really. What you don’t expect is for two well-meaning but clearly drunk morticians to go rooting around in your chest cavity and, in a stunning act of professional malpractice, remove the only thing keeping you dead. Thus begins … Read More “The Werewolf vs. The Vampire Woman (1970)” »
Let’s start with a bold claim: The Night Evelyn Came Out of the Grave is a film that dares to ask, “What if we combined Gothic horror, giallo murder, and erotic psychosis into one moody mess — and then just gave up halfway through?” It is a movie so singular in its ambition, and so … Read More “The Night Evelyn Came Out of the Grave (1971)” »
There’s a moment in Lust for a Vampire when our dashing, tragically over-invested hero Richard LeStrange stares longingly into the eyes of a comely blonde finishing school student — who is, unbeknownst to him, a reincarnated vampire with a taste for girls in ballet slippers — and I found myself wondering, “Do the curtains match … Read More ““Lust for a Vampire” (1971) – Blood, Bosoms, and a Bad Beat Track” »
An Unusual Day Job Denise McConnell was born on December 23, 1958, in Wiesbaden, Germany. Though born abroad, she grew up American – the kind of all-American girl-next-door who just happened to enter adulthood tailing cheating spouses and digging up secrets for a living. Yes, before she ever graced glossy magazine pages, McConnell was working … Read More “Denise McConnell: From Undercover Sleuth to Centerfold and Beyond” »
By the time the bell rings, Andre Chase isn’t just another wrestler striding into the squared circle. He’s part coach, part cult leader, part throwback to the eccentric personalities that made professional wrestling tick long before hashtags and highlight reels. But before Chase U chants echoed through the Performance Center, before he became the unlikely … Read More “Andre Chase: The Professor of Pain” »
Porsche Dreams and Condo Love It always comes down to this: an old rooster with too much money and a young hen with too much skin. Put them in Hollywood, pump in the cocaine and the flashbulbs, and you’ve got the same sad waltz that’s been spinning since Babylon. The faces change. The condos get … Read More “Sylvester Stallone vs Pamela Anderson” »
