If you’ve ever wanted to see a movie where a psychic hypnotist controls a prehistoric “Gill Monster” that looks like it was assembled from a child’s snorkeling set, some ping-pong balls, and a glue gun, Creature of Destruction is the cinematic swamp for you. Larry Buchanan, the reigning king of $1.50 filmmaking, delivers a film so cheap that even Ed Wood would’ve watched it and muttered, “Damn, that’s embarrassing.”
The Plot: Now You See Fish, Now You Don’t
Dr. Basso (Les Tremayne, who somehow didn’t immediately retire after this) hypnotizes his assistant Doreena into becoming a million-year-old amphibious monster that crawls out of Lake Texoma and… slowly waddles toward its victims. Yes, slowly. Like, “I’ll just stand here and let it eat me” slowly. The police are baffled by the trail of carnage, which is impressive, since the creature moves at the speed of a drunk uncle in a rubber wetsuit.
Meanwhile, Captain Ted Dell (Aron Kincaid) is a psychologist-slash-Air Force heartthrob who gets roped into the mystery after his fiancée drags him to a party. He quickly figures out that Doreena is the one fueling Basso’s carnival-grade monster show, and he vows to save her. Unfortunately, saving her means standing around while she gets shot so the Gill Monster can vanish in a puff of “oh never mind.”
The Costume: Party City Reject Special
The Gill Monster “costume” deserves its own credit. It’s literally a rubber wetsuit painted green with fins taped on and a fish mask that looks like someone microwaved Kermit the Frog. Its bulging ping-pong ball eyes give the impression that the monster isn’t a threat so much as a mascot that got lost on the way to a seafood restaurant opening. Fun fact: Buchanan later reused the same costume in It’s Alive! (1969). Yes, he kept it. Like it was worth something.
Production: Shotgun Cinema
This was one of Buchanan’s infamous AIP-TV remakes, and boy, does it show. Aron Kincaid was so desperate to get out that Buchanan had to record his final lines in the back seat of a cab to the airport. Imagine your big dramatic confrontation scene being taped between “Could you roll the window down?” and “Don’t forget to tip the driver.” The film’s musical interludes come courtesy of rockabilly singer Scotty McKay, who belts out Here Comes Batman mid-movie—because nothing says amphibious horror like a knockoff novelty song about the Caped Crusader.
Why It Sucks (and Why That’s the Point)
The pacing is glacial, the dialogue sounds like it was translated from Martian, and the monster attacks play like rejected skits from Laugh-In. The film opens and closes with a Michel de Montaigne quote about mankind being the real monster—an attempt at philosophy that feels wildly misplaced in a movie where the villain is basically a guy in flippers.
Final Verdict
Creature of Destruction is a soggy, budget-bin travesty that takes the already-bad She Creature (1956) and somehow makes it worse. But in its own clumsy way, it’s hilarious—like watching a high school play where someone’s dad shows up in scuba gear to play the villain.
Final Thought: If there’s “no monster in the world so treacherous as man,” then clearly Montaigne never had to sit through Larry Buchanan’s filmography.
