Sometimes a movie’s biggest horror isn’t the demons—it’s the filmmaking itself. The Faith of Anna Waters (released in the U.S. as The Offering) is that special kind of supernatural disaster where even Satan would file a formal complaint with the producers. Billed as “Singapore’s first Hollywood supernatural feature,” it’s the cinematic equivalent of mixing The … Read More “The Faith of Anna Waters (2016): When Even the Devil Looks Confused” »
There are bad horror films, and then there are horror films that make you question your own life choices. Don’t Let the Devil In belongs squarely in the latter category — a 2016 “Appalachiasploitation” thriller (a term the director proudly invented, as if he’d discovered fire in a meth lab) that takes the phrase slow … Read More “Don’t Let the Devil In (2016): When the Devil Saw the Script and Politely Declined” »
Every so often, a horror movie comes along that doesn’t just live up to its title — it becomes it. The Disappointments Room is that movie. Directed by D.J. Caruso and written by Prison Break’s Wentworth Miller, this 2016 supernatural snoozefest starring Kate Beckinsale is less a haunted-house thriller and more a feature-length yawn stretched … Read More “The Disappointments Room (2016): The Title Is a Warning, Not a Metaphor” »
If you’ve ever wondered what would happen if someone tried to reboot Death Note but accidentally replaced its razor-sharp tension and moral intrigue with the narrative consistency of a PowerPoint presentation, then Death Note: Light Up the New World is your answer. Directed by Shinsuke Sato, this 2016 sequel to Death Note 2: The Last … Read More “Death Note: Light Up the New World (2016): When Death Itself Died of Boredom” »
There are bad horror movies, and then there are Daylight’s End — the cinematic equivalent of reheating leftover I Am Legend in a dirty microwave. Directed by William Kaufman and written by Chad Law, this low-budget vampire apocalypse flick tries to be gritty, cool, and brooding. Instead, it’s a sunburned disaster that looks like Mad … Read More “Daylight’s End (2016): Where Plotlines Go to Die and Vampires Forget Their Purpose” »
There are many kinds of horror movies. Some terrify you. Some disturb you. Some burrow into your psyche and stay there for years. And then there’s The Darkness — a movie so bland it makes you long for the sweet embrace of an actual haunting, just for something to happen. Directed by Greg McLean, the … Read More “The Darkness (2016): When the Real Evil Is the Script” »
There are horror films that scream, and there are horror films that whisper softly while locking you in a damp Welsh mansion and forcing you to self-flagellate in the name of spiritual growth. A Dark Song, Liam Gavin’s grimly beautiful 2016 debut, is the latter — an occult procedural that feels like The Exorcist’s introverted … Read More “A Dark Song (2016): How to Summon Your Guardian Angel and Ruin Your Plumbing” »
There are horror movies that scare you, horror movies that make you think, and then there’s The Crucifixion — a film that makes you want to schedule a wellness retreat after realizing that even demonic possession can’t save a journalist’s career. Directed by Xavier Gens (Frontier(s)) and written by the Hayes brothers of The Conjuring … Read More “The Crucifixion (2017): Faith, Fear, and an Unholy Amount of Romanian Tourism Brochures” »
There’s something profoundly exhausting about The Conjuring 2. It’s like being trapped in a haunted house built by a perfectionist with ADHD—every door creaks, every shadow whispers, and every jump scare arrives five minutes late but still insists on applause. James Wan, the master architect of the “Boo! But Classy!” school of horror, returns with … Read More “The Conjuring 2 (2016): A Demon, a Nun, and Two Hours of Déjà Boo” »
Some movies are subtle metaphors. The Cleanse is not one of them. Bobby Miller’s 2016 dark fantasy comedy is the cinematic equivalent of going to a wellness retreat, vomiting up your inner demons, and discovering they’ve turned into literal slimy, cooing creatures that may or may not want to kill you. It’s Eat Pray Love … Read More “The Cleanse (2016): A Self-Help Seminar from Hell (and You’ll Thank It for the Trauma)” »