INTRODUCTION: ABANDON ALL HOPE, YE WHO ENTER DIRECT-TO-VIDEO Some horror movies send shivers down your spine. Cell 213 sends you straight to sleep. Directed by Stephen Kay and starring Eric Balfour, Bruce Greenwood, and Michael Rooker — three actors who deserve way better than this — the film aims for psychological horror and lands somewhere … Read More “CELL 213 (2011): HELL CALLS COLLECT” »
INTRODUCTION: PLEASE HANG UP AND TRY AGAIN Some horror movies are terrifying. Some are thrilling. The Caller is neither — unless you’re scared of waiting on hold for 90 minutes. Directed by Matthew Parkhill, this British-Puerto Rican supernatural horror film stars Rachelle Lefevre, Stephen Moyer, and Lorna Raver, and proves that even when you have … Read More “THE CALLER (2011): DIAL “M” FOR MEH” »
INTRODUCTION: WHEN AVANT-GARDE MEANS “WHY DID I WATCH THIS?” Every now and then, a film comes along that truly tests the boundaries of art — and your will to live. The Bunny Game is one such film, a black-and-white, micro-budget “avant-garde exploitation horror” that’s as subtle as a sledgehammer and as enjoyable as a dental … Read More “THE BUNNY GAME (2011): HOPPING STRAIGHT INTO HELL — AND STAYING THERE FOR 76 MINUTES” »
INTRODUCTION: BLEEDING HEARTS AND BLEEDING WALLS Some horror films sneak up on you like a polite guest who asks for a cup of sugar and then proceeds to turn your kitchen into a crime scene. The Bleeding House is one of those rare little indie gems — polite on the surface, unsettling underneath, and dripping … Read More “THE BLEEDING HOUSE (2011): SOUTHERN HOSPITALITY MEETS SMALL-TOWN BLOODLETTING” »
INTRODUCTION: WELCOME TO THE CAFETERIA OF MADNESS Every so often, a horror movie asks an important question. The Shining asked, “Can isolation drive you mad?” Silence of the Lambs asked, “What’s for dinner?” And Asylum Blackout—also known as The Incident, presumably because even the filmmakers didn’t want their names associated—asks, “What if you combined a … Read More “ASYLUM BLACKOUT (2011): ROCK BAND MEETS RIOT, FILM MEETS INSANITY” »
INTRODUCTION: ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN, ONE GIANT FACEPALM FOR MANKIND Once in a while, a movie comes along that makes you nostalgic for actual NASA footage—because even grainy black-and-white clips of astronauts dropping wrenches on the moon have more tension than this cinematic nap. Enter Apollo 18, a film so committed to the “found … Read More “APOLLO 18 (2011): HOUSTON, WE HAVE A TERRIBLE MOVIE” »
INTRODUCTION: MIKE FLANAGAN’S CREEPY LITTLE KICKSTARTER THAT COULD Before Mike Flanagan gave us The Haunting of Hill House, Midnight Mass, and a decade of finely aged existential despair, he made Absentia—a Kickstarter-funded horror movie about grief, tunnels, and cosmic bureaucracy. Released in 2011, Absentia is one of those rare microbudget films that proves you don’t … Read More “ABSENTIA (2011): A BRIDGE TOO FAR (INTO MADNESS)” »
INTRODUCTION: WHEN NUMEROLOGY GOES TO HELL (LITERALLY) Some horror movies make you afraid of what’s under the bed. Others make you afraid of clowns, dolls, or dark basements. 11-11-11 makes you afraid of numbers — not because they’re cursed, but because this script has no idea how to count to three, let alone 11. Written … Read More “11-11-11 (2011): A DATE WITH DISASTER” »
INTRODUCTION: “WE’RE NOT IN KANSAS… OR REALITY… ANYMORE” If you’ve ever wondered what would happen if The Wizard of Oz were directed by David Lynch after a three-day bender in the New Hampshire woods, congratulations — you’ve already described YellowBrickRoad. Directed by Jesse Holland and Andy Mitton, this 2010 psychological horror gem takes the candy-colored … Read More “YELLOWBRICKROAD (2010): FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK NIGHTMARE” »
INTRODUCTION: WELCOME TO THE SWAMP OF REGRET There are bad creature features — and then there’s Xtinction: Predator X (also known as Alligator X), a movie so aggressively stupid it makes Lake Placid 3 look like Jaws. Directed by Amir Valinia (a man who seems to have edited the film while blindfolded and drunk on … Read More “XTINCTION: PREDATOR X (2010) — WHEN JURASSIC PARK MEETS A GATOR FARM AND LOSES ALL DIGNITY” »