If you’ve ever wondered what it would look like if Ghostbusters went on a diet of decaf coffee and mild disappointment, then congratulations — The Dead Room is your answer. Directed by Jason Stutter and allegedly “inspired” by a 1970s New Zealand haunting (which, judging by this film, must’ve been mostly paperwork and awkward silences), this is a horror movie so polite it might as well knock before entering its own genre.
1. Paranormal Activity: Kiwi Edition
The premise is straightforward enough: three ghost hunters — Liam, Scott, and Holly — are sent by an insurance company to verify whether a rural farmhouse is haunted. Yes, you read that right. The entity funding this investigation isn’t a government agency or a research lab, but an insurance company. Because nothing says “spine-tingling terror” like actuarial risk assessment.
Liam is the tech guy, Scott is the skeptic, and Holly is the psychic who’s about as convincing as someone reading a horoscope off a cereal box. They move into a house that looks like a B&B that failed its health inspection and proceed to spend the next 80 minutes trying to make flickering lights scary. Spoiler: they don’t.
2. Jump Scares That Forgot to Jump
One of the most impressive things about The Dead Room is how much nothing happens — and for how long. The first third of the movie is basically an extended Airbnb review: “The place is quiet. Too quiet. The walls creak. The vibes are bad. Two stars.”
At one point, a door closes by itself. This is treated as a major event, complete with slow-motion camera angles and tense music that suggests we’ve just witnessed the apocalypse. Later, furniture moves — very slowly — as if the ghost were an elderly relative rearranging the living room.
When the characters finally acknowledge that something spooky might be happening, it’s almost out of boredom rather than fear. “Well, that was weird,” says Scott, the skeptic, after a night of levitating furniture. Yes, Scott. Weird. Like the idea that someone thought this scene was worth filming.
3. The Ghost Hunters Who Couldn’t Ghost-Hunt
The film tries to build tension between the three leads, but it’s hard to care because they all have the emotional range of a damp towel. Liam, the tech expert, mostly stares at screens that display absolutely nothing. Scott spends most of the movie lecturing everyone about how ghosts aren’t real, which is a bold stance for a man starring in a ghost movie. And Holly, the psychic, alternates between wide-eyed terror and looking like she’s trying to remember her grocery list.
To make matters worse, these people don’t even run properly when things go bad. When the haunting ramps up, they stumble around the house in slow motion, like three hungover tourists lost in a museum. If the spirit had just waited five more minutes, natural selection would’ve taken care of them.
4. The Science of Stupidity
Scott’s “scientific” approach to ghosts is one of the film’s accidental comedic highlights. His grand theory? Low-frequency sound waves can disperse spirits. You half-expect him to pull out a leaf blower and start yelling, “SCIENCE!”
At one point, he forgets to put a battery in his EMF meter. When he realizes his mistake, the device immediately starts beeping, and everyone gasps like he’s just discovered cold fusion. This is the level of competence we’re dealing with — the supernatural team equivalent of forgetting to turn the oven on.
5. The House That Yawns
The real villain of The Dead Room isn’t the ghost — it’s the pacing. The movie’s runtime is a lean 80 minutes, but it feels like a 12-hour endurance test. The cinematography tries for “atmospheric” and lands squarely on “vacant real estate listing.”
The farmhouse is so well-lit you can practically see the film crew reflected in the windows. There’s no claustrophobia, no mystery — just three people wandering through IKEA’s “Rural Gothic” section. Even the haunting hour, 3 a.m., feels underwhelming here. It’s less “witching hour” and more “time for your fourth cup of instant coffee.”
6. When the Ghost Finally Shows Up
Eventually, the film remembers it’s supposed to be scary and throws in not one, but two ghosts. The first is your garden-variety poltergeist: moody, territorial, slightly passive-aggressive. The second, apparently a “killer ghost,” shows up at the end and kills everyone.
This climactic reveal should feel like a terrifying twist, but it lands more like a bureaucratic handoff: “Oh, you’re done haunting? Cool, my turn.” The deaths are so abrupt and bloodless they barely qualify as “horror.” Holly’s final escape attempt is particularly tragic — not because it’s sad, but because it’s so poorly shot that it looks like she’s running from the film’s own ending.
And when the killer ghost finally appears in full view, it’s… fine. Not terrifying, not even interesting — just fine. You could put this ghost in a Halloween pop-up store and no one would notice.
7. Paranormal? More Like PowerNap Activity
One of the strangest things about The Dead Room is how utterly humorless it is. There’s no wit, no irony, no self-awareness. It takes itself so seriously that you start laughing out of sheer rebellion. The dialogue is so stiff it feels AI-generated:
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“There’s something in the room.”
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“No, there isn’t.”
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“Yes, there is.”
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“No, there isn’t.”
Repeat until someone dies.
Even Peter Jackson’s early splatter films had more personality — and they were made on a budget of leftover sheep bones and duct tape. This film, by contrast, feels like the product of a corporate meeting where everyone agreed that ghosts should be “accessible to all demographics.”
8. The Ending: Death by Anti-Climax
By the time the movie reaches its finale, you’ve stopped rooting for the characters and started rooting for the ghost. When it finally kills everyone, it feels less like tragedy and more like mercy. The film closes with a shot of the ghost finally revealing itself, as if it’s saying, “You made it through this, congratulations. Here’s your monster. Now go home.”
The credits roll, and the biggest scare of the entire movie is realizing that Jason Stutter somehow convinced a film festival to premiere this. Sitges, no less — a place known for celebrating actual horror.
9. The Real Horror: Missed Potential
It’s a shame, because there’s a good movie somewhere inside The Dead Room. The premise — a scientifically-minded ghost investigation that spirals into real terror — could’ve worked if it had any energy, atmosphere, or sense of danger. Instead, it plays like a found-footage film that forgot to find the footage.
The actors are talented (Jed Brophy’s been in Lord of the Rings, for crying out loud), but the script gives them nothing to do except argue about batteries and look vaguely concerned. Even the ghost seems to lose interest halfway through.
10. Final Verdict: The Dead Room — Aptly Named
The Dead Room lives up to its title — it’s dead. No tension, no originality, no pulse. It’s the cinematic equivalent of an empty conference room with the lights off. If you want to see three people whisper about drafts and occasionally scream at invisible furniture, this one’s for you.
Everyone else? Stick to The Others or The Conjuring — movies that remember that horror works best when the audience feels something other than boredom.
In the end, the only truly haunted thing about The Dead Room is the viewer, forever cursed with the memory of how spectacularly un-scary it all was.
Rating: 2/10 — Ghosted by its own potential.
