If you’ve ever wondered how a film can be so devoid of scares, thrills, and anything remotely interesting, look no further than The Bye Bye Man. The movie is essentially a haunted house with no personality—like if you took the scariest part of an old folk tale, gave it a meaningless name (seriously, The Bye Bye Man?), and then threw in a bunch of college kids making bad decisions. It’s a horror film so limp, it barely qualifies as a movie, let alone a supernatural experience. It’s more like an exercise in how many clichés you can fit into 90 minutes before the audience collectively decides to check their phone.
Plot: A Name You Shouldn’t Say—But Everyone Will Say Anyway
Let’s start with the plot, which is just as nonsensical as the film’s name. The Bye Bye Man revolves around Elliot, his girlfriend Sasha, and their friend John, who move into a house and immediately begin seeing things like the sort of pointless coins that just appear and disappear, as well as creepy messages written on the wall. Not to mention the mysterious name: The Bye Bye Man (which sounds more like a lost character from The Teletubbies than a demonic force). Naturally, as soon as the name is spoken, BOOM, cursed. Because what else do you do in a movie with a name like that?
Things start spiraling out of control, with Elliot, Sasha, and John plagued by hallucinations and a series of weird deaths. Not to spoil anything, but the movie barely has the energy to be coherent, much less scary. It’s not so much a psychological thriller as it is a psychological headache. Characters start off making dumb choices and end up making more dumb choices, like when they conduct a séance and—surprise!—actually say the name. At that point, I almost expected the movie to break the fourth wall and have the demon show up on screen to apologize for being part of such a stupid premise.
Characters: Do I Care About Any of These People?
Let’s talk about the characters. Elliot (Douglas Smith) is your classic “I have to figure out what’s going on but I’m way too stupid to do anything about it” protagonist. You know, the type of guy who would probably get cursed by a ghost because he couldn’t keep his mouth shut about a creepy name. His girlfriend Sasha (Cressida Bonas) isn’t much better. She spends most of the movie either being scared or in a state of mild confusion. And then there’s John (Lucien Laviscount), who, to be honest, I couldn’t even remember by the end of the film. Not because he was a bad actor—just because his character was completely irrelevant to everything happening on screen.
And speaking of irrelevant characters, can we talk about Faye Dunaway’s cameo as the widow? She delivers lines like she’s just found out her participation in this film will be used as proof of how badly careers can tank. Honestly, at this point in the film, I wasn’t sure whether I was watching a horror movie or just an actor’s descent into existential despair.
The Demon: The Bye Bye What?
Ah, the true star of the movie—The Bye Bye Man himself. Or, well, itself. Doug Jones, who typically brings creatures to life with impressive prosthetics and grace, somehow gets saddled with playing this dimwitted entity. The problem with The Bye Bye Man is that it’s not even scary. It’s a creature who appears every now and then to make things “creepy,” but it never does anything particularly menacing. It doesn’t chase people, doesn’t drag them into the darkness, and doesn’t even really speak. Instead, it just pops in and out, looking like someone threw a bunch of leftover horror movie tropes into a blender and decided that this, in its half-formed glory, was enough to carry a film.
The Bye Bye Man has the subtlety of a ham-fisted punchline, and the less said about its actual appearance, the better. For a demon that’s supposed to be manipulating minds and creating horror, it comes across more like the punchline to a joke that nobody’s laughing at. Frankly, it’s hard to believe anyone would be scared of something that looks like it was designed during a lunch break by a group of underpaid interns.
The Writing: Let’s Just Put “Creepy Stuff” in Here
If there was ever an award for the most incoherent script, The Bye Bye Man would win, and then promptly forget it had been awarded. The dialogue is clunky at best and laughable at worst. Characters deliver lines that sound more like exposition dumps than actual conversations. At one point, the film introduces a “don’t think it, don’t say it” rule, which everyone promptly breaks. But the movie doesn’t care about the rules it sets up. Much like its demon, it just shambles forward without any concern for logic.
Every character seems to have the emotional range of a cardboard cutout, with no one really responding to the gravity of the situation. When they experience strange things, they don’t freak out. They don’t scream. They just kind of stare at each other, like they’re mildly annoyed at having their evening ruined by supernatural phenomena. This kind of attitude permeates the entire film, and by the time the climax rolls around, you’re not so much worried about the characters’ survival as you are wishing for the credits to roll so you can escape this nightmare of a movie.
The Ending: So You’re Telling Me I Watched This For Nothing?
Ah, yes, the ending. This is where the movie really proves that it has no idea what it’s doing. With every twist, turn, and attempted explanation, The Bye Bye Man continues to get dumber. The final moments of the film feel like a series of haphazardly thrown-together events that only serve to further confuse the already nonsensical narrative. There’s no real closure, no satisfying payoff, and certainly no explanation that makes you feel like watching the whole thing wasn’t a complete waste of time. If anything, it’s like the filmmakers just shrugged and said, “Eh, it’s a horror movie. Let’s end it with some random nonsense and see if anyone notices.”
The final scene, in particular, is so absurd that you can’t help but laugh. The cursed entity is somehow still lingering, the characters are still looking confused, and the audience? Well, they’re likely wondering how they can get their time back.
Conclusion: The Bye Bye Man – A Perfect Reminder of Why You Shouldn’t Watch Movies with a Title That Sounds Like a Children’s Book
The Bye Bye Man is a joke of a horror film—a failure in every sense of the word. The demon is a laughable mess, the characters are forgettable, and the plot is more incoherent than a bad dream. If you’re looking for a horror movie that will make you laugh, this is the one. But if you’re looking for a real fright? You’re better off staying home and watching the clock tick down as you wait for something—anything—to happen that isn’t this disaster of a film.
Rating: 1 out of 5 stars. The only thing you’ll be saying “Bye Bye” to is any sense of satisfaction or enjoyment.
