Witchboard 2 is not a great flick but a watchable one, the kind you rented from a sun-faded Blockbuster shelf in 1995 because the cover art promises boobs, blood, and an angry Ouija board. And it delivers on at least two of those.
Kevin Tenney, who blessed us with Night of the Demons and the original Witchboard, returns to the well for a sequel nobody asked for but everybody needed. This time, the game piece slides across the board and spells out: “Bring Ami Dolenz.”
Ami Dolenz: Our Lady of Mid-’90s VHS
Dolenz plays Paige, an accountant who dreams of becoming an artist. But let’s be honest—nobody rented this tape to see her sketch charcoal portraits. Ami Dolenz was the cinematic equivalent of a summer crush you never got over: blonde, impossibly curvaceous and captured forever on VHS covers that glowed under the humming fluorescent lights of a video-store shrine.. Her wide-eyed innocence makes her the perfect target for demonic possession, and her wardrobe choices (or lack thereof) make her the perfect target for adolescent boys sneaking downstairs after bedtime.
Watching Dolenz in Witchboard 2 is like watching a Playboy Centerfold move into a haunted loft: sure, there’s a demon around, but look at that silhouette. Look at that blouse stretched to its absolute theological limit. If salvation exists, it wears white crop tops.
The Plot: Because We Have to Mention It
Paige moves into a cavernous L.A. loft that looks like it was decorated by a goth realtor with an occult fetish. She finds a Oujia board in the closet and starts chatting with a spirit named Susan. Susan claims she was murdered. Paige, being the gullible cherub she is, believes her.
Meanwhile, Paige’s cop boyfriend Mitch sulks like a human ashtray, her landlords are so creepy they make the Addams Family look like the Brady Bunch, and a sleazy photographer named Russel circles her like a vulture that smells Pantene shampoo.
Things escalate:
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Jonas, the landlord, gets flambéed by a boiler that turns into Satan’s Easy-Bake Oven.
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Elaine, his wife, dies in what might be the most slapstick poltergeist attack ever filmed.
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Russel is revealed to be slimier than a gas station restroom.
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And Paige is slowly possessed by Susan, who apparently never left the apartment and just needed a cute blonde body to borrow.
Eventually the board is smashed, Susan is exorcised, and Paige is free to live another day—presumably moving into a smaller, less haunted studio apartment.
The Ouija Board: Third-Billed Star
If you thought Parker Brothers was just about Monopoly and Sorry!, think again. In the Witchboard franchise, the Ouija board is the true diva. Here it slams shutters, predicts promotions, ruins boyfriends, and serves as the world’s worst dating app. Swipe right, summon demon.
Tenney deserves credit: he treats the board like a character, not a prop. When the planchette moves, you can almost hear it sigh: “Another blonde? Fine. Let’s do this.”
Death Scenes: OSHA Violations with Gore
The kills in Witchboard 2 are less horror and more workplace hazard videos. Jonas being roasted alive by his own boiler feels less like supernatural wrath and more like the result of skipping routine maintenance. Elaine’s death looks like she was attacked by an over-caffeinated stagehand with a wind machine.
But they’re fun. They’re not meant to horrify—they’re meant to keep you awake between shots of Dolenz in tank tops. This is a horror movie that winks at you and says, “Relax, nobody’s scared. Just enjoy the ride.”
Supporting Cast: Human Wallpaper
Let’s be honest: nobody else matters here. Mitch, the cop boyfriend, is so bland he could be played by a Ken doll dipped in cologne. Russel, the photographer, exists only to leer at Paige and remind us that L.A. landlords and artsy men are never to be trusted. Susan, the ghost, is basically “Paige but sluttier.”
The only real supporting character worth mentioning is the apartment itself. That loft has more personality than half the cast—spacious, ominous, echoing with the faint sound of VHS-era doom. If real estate listings were honest, this one would read: “2BR, 1BA, includes poltergeist, great natural light.”
The Genius of Kevin Tenney
Tenney knows what his audience wants: boobs, blood, and a board game that won’t stay in the closet. Witchboard 2 feels like Tenney finally leaned in and said, “Look, we’re not scaring anyone. Let’s make it sexy, silly, and just spooky enough to justify the cover art.”
It works. For every limp scare, there’s Dolenz smiling, pouting, or stripping down to her bra while sketching. For every hokey seance, there’s a reminder that VHS horror was less about terror and more about mood. And the mood here is: “Friday night, $2 rental, pizza grease on your fingers, and hope your mom doesn’t walk in during the shower scene.”
Why It Works (When It Shouldn’t)
On paper, Witchboard 2 is dumb. The script is thinner than Mitch’s personality, the effects are bargain bin, and the mystery is Scooby-Doo with cleavage. And yet it works. Why?
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Ami Dolenz: She’s charming, vulnerable, and magnetic in a way most scream queens aren’t. She doesn’t scream—she beams, even when possessed.
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Tone: It never takes itself too seriously. You’re in on the joke. The filmmakers know you didn’t come for existential terror. You came for VHS camp.
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Nostalgia Factor: Watching it now feels like opening a time capsule of 1993, when horror was in a weird limbo between slashers and CGI. It’s cozy trash cinema, the cinematic equivalent of eating Taco Bell at 2 a.m. You know it’s bad for you, but damn if it doesn’t hit the spot.
The Verdict
Witchboard 2 isn’t scary, but it is entertaining. It’s not art, but it is artful in its understanding of the audience. It knows we want Ami Dolenz painting in lingerie while ghosts slam doors, and it gives us that. It knows we want goofy death scenes, moody lighting, and a Ouija board acting like a toxic ex-boyfriend, and it delivers.
