The Witchcraft franchise is the cinematic equivalent of a cockroach: no matter how many times you think it’s dead, it comes crawling back, uglier and more unnecessary than before. By the time we get to Witchcraft VIII: Salem’s Ghost, the series has already spent seven entries shambling around like a drunk uncle at Thanksgiving. But instead of continuing the misadventures of bargain-bin warlock-lawyer Will Spanner, the producers decided to “reinvent” the saga with a stand-alone spin-off.
Spoiler: reinvention is just a fancy word for “we had no script and shot it in the basement of somebody’s cousin.”
The Setup: Salem, 1692, or Community Theater on Valium
The film opens in 1692 during the Salem witch trials. At least, that’s what the box says. What’s on screen looks more like a middle-school reenactment staged with leftover Halloween costumes from Walgreens. A warlock is executed—sort of. The “execution” mostly consists of bad lighting, wooden dialogue, and a guy in a burlap cloak pretending to die while everyone else looks like they’re waiting for the pizza delivery.
This opening could’ve set up a spooky, gothic atmosphere. Instead, it sets up 90 minutes of regret.
Fast Forward: Welcome to Suburban Horror (Minus the Horror)
We jump ahead to the 1990s, where Sonny (Lee Grober) and Mary Ann (Kim Kopf) move into a Massachusetts home after a marriage crisis. Nothing says “let’s fix our broken relationship” like moving into a moldy colonial house sitting on top of a warlock’s grave.
Enter the neighbors: Mitch (David Wells) and Gayle (Anthoni Stewart). They seem like your run-of-the-mill suburbanites until Mitch accidentally unearths the warlock’s tomb in Sonny’s basement. Because of course the warlock is buried under the basement. That’s not lazy writing—it’s geologically impossible.
Mitch then gets possessed by the evil spirit and spends the rest of the movie trying to recruit more souls for his newly acquired dark side. If that sounds exciting, let me assure you: it isn’t. Watching Mitch “turn evil” is like watching a tax accountant get slightly more rude over the course of an afternoon.
Possession Has Never Been This Boring
Normally in possession films, the transformation comes with cool side effects—levitation, demonic voices, projectile vomiting, at least a head spin or two. Mitch, on the other hand, just squints, snarls, and occasionally raises his voice like a dad who just found out his kid dented the car.
At one point, he literally just stares at the camera with what I think was supposed to be menace but came off more like constipation. Imagine The Exorcist, but instead of pea soup and spinning heads, you get a guy muttering about “power” in a Boston basement.
The “Heroes”: Sonny and Mary Ann
Lee Grober’s Sonny is the kind of protagonist you forget is even in the movie. He’s less a character and more a beige sofa in khakis. His wife Mary Ann fares a little better because she at least tries to emote, but their chemistry together has all the heat of a tax seminar.
The entire subplot about their marriage troubles is supposed to add emotional stakes. Instead, it makes you root for the warlock. At least he seems motivated.
The Priest: Deus Ex Clergyman
Eventually, the movie remembers it needs an ending. Enter the priest, who shows up, waves a cross around, and saves the day. That’s it. The entire climax boils down to “random priest shows up and fixes things.”
It’s like the filmmakers had no idea how to resolve the plot and just said, “Eh, let’s throw in a priest. That worked in The Exorcist.” Except in The Exorcist, the priest was a tragic, conflicted character. Here, he’s basically a plot-bandage in a collar.
The Continuity Nightmare
Fans of the Witchcraft series (all three of them) were baffled when this entry had nothing to do with Will Spanner, the franchise’s resident wet mop of a protagonist. Instead, Salem’s Ghost was pitched as the start of a new saga—one that would spin off into its own trilogy.
Spoiler: it didn’t.
This was the one and only appearance of the so-called Salem’s Ghost storyline, and after seeing it, you understand why. Watching this movie is like watching someone try to reboot The Brady Bunch as a horror series—it’s pointless, embarrassing, and doomed from the start.
The only “continuity” is that the house looks suspiciously like the one from Witchcraft V, which is less a callback and more an admission that the production company just reused the same rental property.
The Acting: Paranormal Amateurs
Lee Grober delivers his lines like he’s reading the world’s most boring grocery list. Kim Kopf does her best, but she’s stranded in scenes that feel like outtakes from a soap opera. David Wells as Mitch is the real comedy here. His “evil possession” amounts to heavy breathing and glaring, as though someone told him to act like a werewolf but he only watched a clip of Teen Wolf Too.
The supporting cast looks confused, as if they weren’t told this was a horror movie until the day of shooting. Which, honestly, might be true.
The Horror: Salem’s Snooze
Let’s talk scares—or the lack thereof. There are no creepy visuals, no atmosphere, no tension. The warlock’s tomb looks like it was built with Styrofoam and sadness. The possession scenes are laughable. The “haunting” is limited to Mitch occasionally acting cranky at dinner.
Even the “climax” is dull: a priest waves a cross, Mitch glares, and the warlock’s spirit presumably goes back to taking a nap. Roll credits.
I’ve seen scarier things in a Bed Bath & Beyond clearance aisle.
Why This Exists
Why was this movie made? Two reasons:
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The Witchcraft franchise was cheap to produce. Shot on shoestring budgets, these films could be churned out like microwavable burritos.
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Troma distributed it. Which means you knew you were getting bargain-bin schlock with a horror label slapped on.
This was less about storytelling and more about filling video store shelves in the ’90s. Remember: this was the golden age of Blockbuster, where cover art mattered more than content. And the cover promised Salem witchery and ghosts, which sounded way more fun than what we got: suburban boredom and awkward basement arguments.
Final Thoughts: Burn It All
Witchcraft VIII: Salem’s Ghost is the franchise’s low point—and that’s saying something for a series that has thirteen entries and counting. It abandons its one flimsy through-line (Will Spanner), introduces characters no one cares about, and resolves its entire conflict with a priest-shaped Band-Aid.
It’s not scary. It’s not sexy. It’s not even trashy fun. It’s just… beige. Beige horror. A film so devoid of energy that even the warlock seemed embarrassed to haunt it.
