Every generation deserves a horror movie so catastrophically misguided that future anthropologists will dig it up, hold it to the light, and whisper, “So this is why society collapsed.” For 2024, that movie is #AMFAD: All My Friends Are Dead — a film that feels like it was crowd-sourced from the worst parts of TikTok, Reddit creepypastas, and that one guy at a party who insists NFT culture ruined his life.
Directed by Marcus Dunstan, written by people who presumably hate both influencers and film, #AMFAD is a cautionary tale. Not about serial killers. Not about group trauma. No — it’s a warning about what happens when you let algorithms write human dialogue.
Spoiler: humans lose.
The Plot: Seven Deadly Sins, Zero Good Ideas
We begin 20 years after a massacre at a music festival. Apparently, a mysterious killer murdered people based on the Seven Deadly Sins, which really just proves that even murderers in 2004 were pretentious.
Now the festival is back, and so is a new group of victims — sorry, “characters.” They are influencers, which in horror movie terms means:
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no survival skills
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no emotional depth
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no reasonable decision-making
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no chance of living past 40 minutes
Our cast includes Sarah, Mona, Will, Liv, L.B., and Guy — a group so terminally online you half expect the killer to dispatch them using Terms of Service violations. Their friend Aaron stays behind, because his job (apparently the only job in America) cannot spare him for 24 hours.
Their car breaks down. A police officer delivers them to an Airbnb. And if you guessed the Airbnb has hidden cameras, congratulations — you’ve seen at least one horror movie made in the last 25 years.
The Killings: Mostly Creative, Occasionally Silly, Always Dumb
The first death occurs when Guy, who is high enough to believe he could debate a tree, is kidnapped by the killer. Said killer then pumps Guy full of gas until he explodes, proving once and for all that the real villain is gluten.
Later, while L.B. and Mona get busy with the enthusiasm of two people trying to win a sex tape film festival, Mona sees the killer photobombing in the background. Not screaming, not reacting, not calling 911 — no, she treats it like a cryptid sighting and goes about her evening.
Liv eventually gets kidnapped and dangled under boiling water while viewers online are challenged to get the livestream to 1,000 likes. This is the most realistic part of the movie, because absolutely yes, people would like this. They’d share it. They’d duet it. They’d hashtag it with #HotTubChallenge.
The killer then kills L.B. with a bladed dildo — a sentence that feels like a personal attack on the English language.
The Twist: Everyone Is Somehow Worse Than the Killer
Eventually, the group discovers the truth: years ago, they received a nude video from their friend Collette, and instead of acting like normal humans, they:
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uploaded it
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ruined her life
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went to her cabin to “apologize”
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found her dead
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hid all evidence
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burned the cabin
Honestly, at this point the killer seems like the only person with reasonable boundaries.
From here, the movie becomes a combination of trauma dumping, screaming, and revelations so stupid they deserve their own parking spaces.
Will and Liv die. Mona tries to escape but ends up stabbed. Sarah reveals she and Officer Shaw planned EVERYTHING. Surprise! Shaw saved Sarah from suicide, they crafted a revenge plot, and they used the aesthetic of a serial killer from 20 years ago to frame an entire generation.
But wait.
It gets dumber.
The Double Twist: Even the Conspirators Hate Each Other
In the final moments, Sarah throws gasoline on the plot, lights a match, and detonates the entire story. She reveals:
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SHE was the one who killed Collette by accident.
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SHE framed it as suicide.
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SHE blamed the friend group.
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SHE manipulated Shaw into helping her.
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SHE glues Shaw’s gun to her hand, forcing police to kill her.
Sarah then smiles into the camera, declares “All my friends are dead,” and walks away as if she didn’t just execute the most convoluted Mean Girls revenge arc ever committed to film.
This woman didn’t need a killer.
She was the killer.
Of logic.
Of narrative structure.
Of the audience’s patience.
The Mid-Credits Scene: Because We Needed More Nonsense
In a desperate attempt to set up a sequel that absolutely nobody asked for, the movie ends with Sarah getting a phone call from the original killer — the one from 20 years ago — who threatens to kill everyone she knows.
Sir, please. She doesn’t know anyone. That was the whole point.
The Performances: Earnest Attempts in a Burning Dumpster
Jade Pettyjohn (Sarah) acts like she genuinely wants to elevate the material, which is admirable because the material is a swamp. She gives her all — wide-eyed terror, rage, tears, manic glee. It’s too good for this movie, which is kind of sad.
JoJo Siwa plays Collette, and she deserves credit for committing absolutely. She hits emotional beats, she screams convincingly, and she seems to be having fun. She also somehow manages to survive the script’s attempts to kill her dignity. A victory.
Everyone else? They do fine. But you can tell that halfway through filming, the cast realized they were making a movie that would someday appear on a “Top 10 Worst Attempted Slashers” YouTube list.
The Humor: Mostly Unintentional But Very Present
To be fair, the movie is funny — usually not when it wants to be.
Examples of accidental comedy:
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The killer using a bladed dildo like it’s a medieval weapon.
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The “1,000 likes to save a life” livestream, which feels like an episode of Black Mirror directed by someone who’s never used the internet.
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Sarah’s master plan, which resembles a group project made at 3 a.m.
Examples of intentional comedy that work:
None.
But we still laughed.
**Final Verdict:
A Murderous Mess, But at Least It’s Never Boring**
#AMFAD is:
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badly plotted
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strangely edited
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tonally confused
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morally unhinged
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laughably written
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aggressively stupid
…yet it’s also strangely watchable.
This is the cinematic equivalent of eating an entire bag of expired gummy worms. You know it’s bad. You know it’s going to hurt you. But also? You can’t stop.
If you enjoy:
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train wrecks
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influencer schadenfreude
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camp that isn’t self-aware
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kills that would make even Saw roll its eyes
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villains who double-cross everyone including themselves
…then congratulations.
You’ve found your perfect disaster.
All your friends may not be dead, but after watching this film, at least some of your brain cells will be.
