Let’s face it: at some point in life, we all ask ourselves, “What would it take for me to get another round of Chucky movies?” You know, something fresh, something innovative, something that still manages to bring that creepy, campy joy, all while preserving the sanctity of that iconic voice. Cult of Chucky, directed by … Read More “Review of Cult of Chucky – A Delightfully Twisted Dollhouse of Chaos” »
If you ever wondered what happens when a serial killer goes through a midlife crisis, Creep 2 is here to answer that existential question with more awkward silences, unsettling monologues, and so many cringey moments that you might need a therapy session afterward. Directed by Patrick Brice and written by Brice and Mark Duplass, Creep … Read More “Review of Creep 2 – A Serial Killer’s Midlife Crisis With a Side of Dark Humor and Shovels” »
Ah, The Changeover. The film that manages to take a coming-of-age drama, add a sprinkle of teenage angst, and top it all off with a healthy dose of ancient demon-hunting magic. It’s like Harry Potter and Buffy the Vampire Slayer had a love child who decided to wear a black hoodie and save the world … Read More “Review of The Changeover – When Teen Angst Meets Ancient Demons and Psychic Powers, What Could Go Wrong?” »
If you’ve ever wondered how a film can be so devoid of scares, thrills, and anything remotely interesting, look no further than The Bye Bye Man. The movie is essentially a haunted house with no personality—like if you took the scariest part of an old folk tale, gave it a meaningless name (seriously, The Bye … Read More “Review of The Bye Bye Man – Or: How to Make a Movie So Bad, Even the Ghost Doesn’t Want to Stick Around” »
If you’ve ever thought, “Hey, what’s missing from modern horror films? Oh, I know! A basement with a demonic presence that thrives on lust and arousal. Now THAT’S a story I’m dying to see,” then congratulations, you are the target audience for The Black Room. Directed by Rolfe Kanefsky, this movie serves up the kind … Read More “Review of The Black Room – Where Lust Meets Mediocrity in a Basement” »
Black Butler: Book of the Atlantic (or Black Butler: The Movie of No Real Consequence) is a 2017 animated supernatural disaster film based on the Black Butler manga series, which, for some reason, now involves zombies, a cruise ship, and a cast of characters that seem more suited for a Victorian reality show than anything … Read More “Review of Black Butler: Book of the Atlantic – A Sinking Ship of Nonsense” »
The Basement, a film that feels like a three-hour punishment session from the depths of a Craigslist horror ad, introduces us to a deranged serial killer, Bill Anderson (or as I like to call him, “The Gemini”), who tortures his victims in his basement. It’s a film that tries so hard to be edgy and … Read More “Review of The Basement (2017) – A Film That’ll Make You Glad You Don’t Live in a Basement” »
If you thought the Amityville Horror franchise had explored every inch of its haunted, decrepit floorboards, I’m here to tell you—you were sadly, sadly mistaken. Amityville: Evil Never Dies, also known by its much more tantalizing (read: confusing) title, Amityville Clownhouse, is the kind of movie that makes you wonder if the franchise has turned … Read More “Review of Amityville: Evil Never Dies (2017): A Haunted House of Horror Clichés, Now with Clowns” »
Imagine you’ve just settled into a nice, peaceful evening of horror, only to have it interrupted by a movie that does everything wrong, yet somehow manages to keep you watching. Always Be With You (also known as Naalu Aaru Anju) is like a family reunion gone horribly, horribly wrong—except instead of embarrassing uncles telling bad … Read More “Review of Always Be With You (2017): The Ultimate Family Reunion… From Hell” »
Let’s start by stating the obvious: Against the Night is a horror film so riddled with clichés, plot holes, and questionable decisions, it makes a shaky-cam “found footage” movie feel like Citizen Kane. It’s a ghost hunting romp that never quite figures out what it wants to be—an alien invasion flick, a haunted house mystery, … Read More “Review of Against the Night (2017): A Horror Film With More Gas Than a Haunted Prison” »