The Plot: Where History Meets Pure Madness
Welcome to the 14th century, where ignorance is bliss, and anyone with a nice set of witchy tits can get tortured for sport. Inquisition opens with the plague sweeping through medieval France—nothing says “fun” like a pandemic! The townsfolk, naturally, point fingers at women and scream “WITCH!” And what better way to address this than hiring a witchfinder named Bernard de Fossey (played by none other than Paul Naschy) to spread his holy wrath and wreck havoc on every woman with a pulse.
So, Bernard and his lecherous, less-than-helpful sidekicks Nicolas and Pierre take the torturing game to new levels—cranking out confessions like it’s their side gig. Catherine, a young girl with a heart full of unrequited love and a future full of bad decisions, watches her fiancé get murdered by hired goons in the forest. She then decides to make a pact with Satan—because that’s what you do when your life is in shambles and you’re in medieval France. If you thought it couldn’t get crazier, wait for the dream sequence where she meets Satan himself (Paul Naschy, again), decked out in a fabulous leotard. 10/10 would join his cult.
As if that wasn’t enough, Catherine, in her infinite wisdom, seduces Bernard and gets him all tangled up in some sexy witchcraft business. Eventually, it all leads to a fiery finale, with Catherine sacrificing her life to get sweet justice for her dead fiancé and bring down Fossey. Honestly, by the time both characters are burned at the stake, you’re just relieved the madness is over.
The Characters: Witches, Lecherous Buffoons, and Naschy in a Leotard
First, let’s talk about Bernard de Fossey. This guy spends most of the movie torturing women in ways that would make Game of Thrones characters look like a bunch of softies. But don’t worry—Paul Naschy plays him with the kind of haunted intensity that only an actor who has spent way too much time in a leotard can muster. But wait, he’s also Satan? Yes, in a bizarre twist that will make you wonder if Naschy was just itching to play the Devil while wearing something that hugged his thighs just a bit too much.
Then there’s Catherine (played by the stunning Daniela Giordano), who somehow gets both a demon and the creepiest witchfinder in medieval history lusting after her. She doesn’t exactly make great choices, but then again, in a movie where Satan is on speed dial, who can blame her? She’s a girl who’s willing to give up her soul for revenge—and honestly, who isn’t, right?
The rest of the cast? Pure cannon fodder. Nicolas and Pierre are more of a joke than a threat. They stand around looking as clueless as the audience when Naschy tries to act all mysterious in his Satanic get-up. But let’s not forget Madeleine (Mónica Randall), the woman who seems more concerned about looking pretty while torturing people than actually being competent at, you know, not being evil. Everyone else? You’ll forget them five minutes after the credits roll.
The Special Effects: Holy Hell, the Demon Looks Like a Ridiculous Halloween Prop
In the “what were they thinking?” department, we have Belphegor, the demon who appears in Catherine’s bizarre dream sequence. Now, I don’t know what you were expecting, but I sure wasn’t ready for a demon that looks like it was pulled straight out of a Halloween store sale. This thing’s got red eyes, a ridiculous headpiece, and a body that looks like it was assembled by someone who was told to “just use whatever random stuff you find in the craft closet.” And yet, this demonic monstrosity somehow adds to the charm of the film. I mean, who doesn’t love an unintentional comedy show while watching a woman sacrifice herself to Satan?
The Verdict: A Cult Classic for All the Wrong Reasons
Inquisition is one of those films that leaves you both confused and weirdly entertained. It’s a gothic disaster of epic proportions, featuring ridiculous characters, laughable special effects, and the kind of plot that should come with a warning label: “Do not operate heavy machinery while watching this movie.”
In the end, it’s so bad that it circles around to being good—if you enjoy watching a film that feels like it was made by a director who had no idea what genre they were going for. Is it horror? Is it a tragedy? Is it a comedic romp through medieval torture? Yes. Yes, it is all of these things. But mostly, it’s an excuse for Paul Naschy to rock a leotard and call himself Satan. And for that, I think we can all be grateful—or at least, deeply disturbed.
If you’re looking for a film with a wild blend of medieval horror, unhinged performances, and the occasional laugh at the absurdity of it all, Inquisition delivers. Just don’t go in expecting high art.
