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  • The Outing (1987): Be Careful What You Wish For, Especially if You Wished for This Movie

The Outing (1987): Be Careful What You Wish For, Especially if You Wished for This Movie

Posted on August 25, 2025 By admin No Comments on The Outing (1987): Be Careful What You Wish For, Especially if You Wished for This Movie
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Genie in a Bottle? More Like Garbage in a Lamp

The Outing (originally The Lamp) wants to be a supernatural slasher, a mystical creature feature, and a museum-set horror extravaganza all rolled into one. What it delivers instead is a cinematic dumpster fire fueled by bad acting, bargain-bin effects, and a killer genie with the intimidation factor of a Chuck E. Cheese animatronic.

The premise is simple enough: a group of teens sneak into a museum overnight, unleash an evil djinn from an ancient lamp, and promptly get slaughtered. It’s basically Night at the Museum if Ben Stiller had been replaced by six cardboard cutouts and a catatonic genie.

Prologue Problems: The Djinn Has Trust Issues

The movie opens in 1893 with an Arab girl smuggling a lamp into Texas because… reasons. Her mom dies immediately, the genie kills everyone else, and the girl scampers off with the lamp. Smash cut to a century later, when burglars break into her mansion and steal the lamp, unleashing the genie once again. By the time this opening sequence is over, you’re already exhausted. It’s the cinematic equivalent of someone explaining a dream they had—long, confusing, and punctuated by random stabbings.

The Museum: Houston, We Have a Stinker

Eventually, the cursed lamp ends up in a Houston museum, where it’s catalogued by Dr. Wallace (James Huston) and ogled by his teenage daughter Alex (Andra St. Ivanyi). She puts on the magic bracelet linked to the lamp and can’t take it off, which is as subtle as the movie gets about foreshadowing. Meanwhile, the genie lurks, watching from inside the lamp like a creep at a peephole.

The museum itself looks like it was rented for a weekend shoot, and boy, do they make sure to show every corner of it. If you’ve ever wanted a 90-minute tour of Houston’s Natural History Museum accompanied by shrieking teenagers and bad lighting, congratulations—this is your masterpiece.

Our Cast of Idiots:

Alex drags her boyfriend Ted and her friends—Babs, Ross, Gwen, and Terry—into the museum for an overnight “outing.” (Get it? Because The Outing? Clever, right? Wrong.) Add Alex’s abusive ex-boyfriend Mike and his meathead sidekick Tony, and you’ve got enough fodder for the genie to keep busy until the credits roll.

Problem is, the characters are so bland you don’t even remember their names until they’re already dead. They exist solely to drink beer, have sex, and stumble blindly into the djinn’s increasingly stupid murder setups.

Death by Snake in Pants: The High Point

The killings are where the movie should shine. Instead, they reek. Victims are mauled by snakes, gutted by spears, strangled by mummies, or impaled on random museum props. Ross gets torn in half. Babs gets bitten by a swarm of snakes while bathing in the specimen room (because naturally you’d strip down in a museum sink). Gwen is assaulted by Mike, only to be “rescued” when the genie murders everyone in the room. Terry dies when a snake crawls into his pants and bites him to death, leaving him convulsing in vomit. It’s the film’s most memorable death, but let’s be honest—“death by trouser snake” is something better suited for a frat party cautionary tale.

The Djinn: Wish You Weren’t Here

For a supernatural villain, the djinn is spectacularly unimpressive. Sometimes it possesses corpses. Sometimes it animates museum exhibits. Sometimes it just flickers lights. When it finally reveals its true monstrous form near the climax, it looks like a rejected Power Rangers villain—rubbery, immobile, and vaguely embarrassed to be on camera.

The tagline could’ve been: “You’ll wish you hadn’t wasted your wish on this movie.”

Sex, Beer, and Zero Tension

What should be a claustrophobic night of supernatural terror plays instead like a bad high school play. Characters wander the museum hallways, looking bored until it’s their turn to get killed. There’s no tension, no suspense, and certainly no scares. Every kill is telegraphed so obviously you can set your watch by it.

And then there’s the awkward attempt at sexual menace: Mike, Alex’s ex, tries to rape Gwen while Tony cheers him on. It’s an ugly, unnecessary subplot, and the only “relief” is when the djinn intervenes by murdering all three. Nothing says escapist horror fun like poorly staged sexual assault followed by rubber monster justice.

Family Drama, Now with Extra Stupidity

Dr. Wallace, meanwhile, is busy lecturing Alex about responsibility, while his girlfriend Eve (Deborah Winters) tries to play the cool stepmom-in-waiting. When they discover Alex lied about her whereabouts, they rush to the museum—because apparently Houston police can’t handle magical artifacts, but Dad sure can.

In the end, Dr. Wallace dies, is briefly reanimated as a djinn puppet, and then gets immolated along with the lamp. Eve survives. Alex survives. The audience’s will to live does not.

Production Values: Made for TV, But Worse

The Outing was shot on a $1.50 budget, and it shows. The lighting looks like it was borrowed from a middle school auditorium. The sound design makes dialogue echo like it’s being recorded in a bathroom stall. And the “special effects” mostly consist of stock smoke machines and rubber limbs. The genie’s glowing jewel looks like a Halloween prop from Kmart.

The film was cut by two minutes for U.S. release, but those edits couldn’t save it. If anything, it should’ve been cut by 88 minutes.

Why It Fails:

  1. Derivative Premise: A cursed artifact unleashing evil in a confined location. We’ve seen it a hundred times—better.

  2. Terrible Characters: Unlikeable, unmemorable, and unworthy of survival.

  3. Laughable Monster: A djinn so incompetent it couldn’t scare a toddler at a birthday party.

  4. Tone-Deaf Subplots: Rape attempt, family melodrama, and astrology—none handled well.

  5. Zero Atmosphere: A horror movie set in a museum that manages to be less scary than Night at the Museum 2.

Final Verdict: Put This Lamp Back in the Basement

The Outing is one of those ‘80s horror films that proves just slapping a supernatural villain into a teen-slasher template doesn’t automatically equal fun. It’s a dull, poorly edited mess that wastes its unique setting, fails to make its monster scary, and insults the audience with its lazy writing.

The museum location could’ve been atmospheric. The djinn mythology could’ve been intriguing. Instead, we get horny teens, snakes in pants, and a genie who looks like he’d rather be anywhere else.

If you ever find yourself holding a mysterious lamp in a museum basement, don’t rub it. Don’t make a wish. Just throw it straight into the incinerator. Especially if it’s glowing red, and especially if it promises to show you The Outing.

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